The awareness of Narcissism is spreading like wild fire. In addition, narcissists are educating themselves about Narcissism; but not to change themselves. They are learning about it to then accuse other people of being narcissists.
Narcissists are educating themselves about Narcissism, to then, beat others to punch in order to deflect and shift blame. They do it to manipulate and cause confusion. So does the narcissist know they are a narcissist? Probably YES!
What I’ve observed with the narcissists I know, is that they take some pride in being a narcissist. They see themsleves as smarter and more resourceful. They believe they set the standard for others to work towards. But, they just don’t want the negative parts of being a narcissist associated with them. So, many will pretend not to be due to the negative connotations attached to being a narcissist.
Narcissists love to project their negative tendencies, thoughts and emotions onto others. They are very deluded and simply insane, to the point where they would manipulate someone into believing that they are the narcissist and not them. Instead of working on themselves and taking ownership for their actions, they find it easier to just blame someone else.
How pathetic is that!
It takes a truly selfish, deluded, wicked and unempathetic person to do something like this. But that is what we can expect from narcissists.
The odd narcissist who is not familiar with the term ‘narcissist’ or that they are one, still behaves in the same manner. Even when there is no term or label to describe the abuse they put others through when confronted the narcissist will still try to absolve themselves from all blame. They will take everything you accuse them of and throw it back at you trying to make something stick.
The worst thing about narcissists knowing what they are, is that they can better pretend not to be one. We have narcissists with YouTube channels pretending to be victims of narcissistic abuse. We have the ‘Educated Narcissists’ with their degrees acting as professionals in this subject area, pretending to care about helping others.
Narcissists care about no one but themselves and what these ‘Pretenders’ are getting is a truck full of narcissistic supply from true victims of Narcissistic Abuse. Narcissists do not miss an opportunity and many have realised that pretending to be the victim or a survivor of Narcissistic Abuse is more beneficial for their pockets and their egos.
If a narcissist calls you a narcissist, don’t even argue with them just tell them they are too deluded to know the difference and walk away.
Should you tell the narcissist that they are a narcissist?
It depends on who that narcissist is. If it’s your boss, co-worker, fellow church member or school mate; NO! There is no point; you will just be bringing unnecessary negative attacks your way.
The only time I think it is necessary would be, for the closer, personal relationships. For example: If you discover you are in a relationship with someone who is and you’ve decided to walk way, only then should you let them know that you know. Leave a letter, send a text then cut all contact.
But you don`t tell them to start an arguement. Also, do not tell them hoping that they will listen right a way and agree with you. No, they will not! Be prepared to cut all ties and go no contact because the narcissist will not allow it to slide.
Conclusion
Many narcissists already know that they are narcissists and all narcissists know that something is wrong with them but they will not admit it. So, even if they don’t know yet they are a narcissist, they know that there is a dark, empty void that they can’t seem to fill.
Narcissists work hard to convince the people around them that they are perfect and all is well in their world, when it’s not. Narcissists comfort themselves with LIES but they will not be able to run or hide from the truth forever,
Narcissists are the Great Pretenders! To the outiside world they pretend to be Everything They Are Not!
Exposing The Narcissist 
I think too often a person with a narcissistic persona and another person with a high self-esteem become confusing subjects. Narcissism is about negative projections and high self-esteem is positive projections. For instance, have you ever taken a personality quiz? I took a narcisstic quiz and I’m fairly confident I knew how to answer if I wanted a low score, but I was honest and I scored 19 out of 40. Per the algorithm, I was borderline narcisstic. However, if the same questions were asked for a self-esteem assessment, it would have shown I have a fairly good self-esteem. There is always a minimum of 2 sides to a story.
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Yes, I can see what you are saying about high self-esteem and narcissism. I’ve done personality tests. I did a vanity one and it told me I wasn’t vain at all, and why did I even bother doing the test LOL! I also score very low on narc tests. My personality is an ISTP which is rare for a female to be as well but I guess explains why I am the way I am. There is definitely nothing wrong with being very confident, as you say it comes down to the positive and negative projections.
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