This is a question that some of my YouTube followers have asked because I do not reveal my identity. Although I share quite a bit about my personal life, my actual identity remains a secret. I share a lot of personal information about myself and family so I don’t think it would be wise to reveal my identity. I also never liked being the centre of attention. I am quite shy and would always prefer to work behind the scenes than be in the spot light. So, with my YouTube channel and Website it is no different. My name is Clarice and I am a real person with real experiences of narcissism. The choice is yours whether you want to hear or believe what I have to say but I do hope you have open mind.
This is what I can reveal; I am someone who found themselves married to a narcissist. All of a sudden everything started to make sense. And it all dawned on me why things in my life weren’t working out the way I thought it should. Not only was my husband a narcissist but his mother and sisters were all narcissists. Then I realised my dad was as well and my younger brother. I started being able to identify the narcissists in my life and started to set boundaries. But, having one as my husband and father of my children was a tough pill to swallow. After being with him for over 15 years and having 4 children I felt absolutely stuck.
I did what I thought was right, I confronted him and gave him an ultimatum. Of course, he denied, played the victim, gas-lighted me and all the wonderful things that narcissists like to do. I held my ground, set boundaries and told him NO many times. His narcissism went to a whole new level where it became even evident to the children that something was wrong with ‘daddy’. I made sure I called him out on his actions and his narcissism every time. He eventually decided to look into it and concluded that being a narcissist may not be all that bad and that narcissists were special and better than there peers. The drama continued but the tension and silent treatments took their toll and my health began to decline. I had to be rushed to the doctor at one point and that’s when the change began.
After the doctor visit, he divulged that he will try and change as he doesn’t want to lose me. He wanted me to help him but I made it plain that this is something that I don’t want to get involved in. I had felt depleted emotionally, physically and spiritually and didn’t feel like I should dedicate any more of time to him. I would only give recommendations but that’s it. He accepted but we then agreed that he would need to give me daily updates. Thus, the journey began!
What I discovered is that Narcissism is not just a mental disorder it is a spiritual disorder of the soul. Narcissists are demonically possessed! Observing my husband as he tried to fight his demons convinced me even more. Overcoming narcissism isn’t easy! But even trying to convince these narcissists that they need to change is even just as hard.
I’ve learnt a lot over the years and the hindsight of evaluating my up-bringing with a narcissistic parent and even dealing with my narcissistic in-laws have taught me a lot about these people. I also believe that the Most High God has blessed me with a spirit of discernment and now I understand more about narcissism than can be taught.
So, here I am, teaching others about narcissists. Definitely, not something I ever thought I would be doing but I love serving and helping others and it brings me much satisfaction.
As a result, I believe that at this time who I am, is not as important as what I have to share so I hope you stick with me as I continue to Expose the Narcissist.
Narcissism is more than a mental disorder and that’s why doctors are not able to help this people. Narcissism is a Disease of the Soul.